Try to Forget
by PhantomhiveHost
Summary: Slightly AU, post-Season 2: Hei is distraught over Yin's death, and wants to forget his gruesome past. Misaki wants nothing more than to start over. After Izanami, the Gate became less of a point of interest for the police, and they decided to transfer her to a new department. Even though her new position is higher, she still misses life in Section 4...Eventual HeixMisaki. R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**FACTS THAT CHANGE BETWEEN THE ACTUAL ANIME AND THIS FIC:  
****1. Misaki does not know that Li and Hei are the same person-or that he's BK201.  
that's it, really. That's the main change. I realized this after I posted it (thank you, Destinies Entwined!) and I was going to fix it with a prequel chapter of sorts, but then I got lazy *sheepish*. So...yeah now it's just AU. **

Hei downed his drink and slammed the glass on the table, not caring who heard. Nothing mattered now, not anymore. Not after Yin. He'd killed her. Maybe there was another way to save them all, but he hadn't been thinking. "Take my life, Hei," she'd said, and he'd seen no other option. And now Yin was dead. It was all his fault. He should've saved her.

But to punish himself for taking her life, he had turned back to drinking. His hair grew longer than it had before- it was past his shoulders now. Maybe he \could leave this depression out of concern for Suoh Pavlichenko, but the young girl was well past the age of dependence, and she didn't need him anymore. There was no more need to fight anymore. No one to protect, no one to serve. And above all, no more Yin. She wasn't there anymore, so why bother even living?

A knock at the door startled Hei out of his depressed drunken thoughts. He stumbled to the door and opened it a crack. "What?" he asked. It wasn't anyone's familiar face-not that he was friendly with the neighbors or anything.

"Li Shengshun? It's me, Misaki! Do you mind if I stop in to ask you some questions?" a woman said cheerfully. Her face fell when she smelled the alcohol on his breath, and she looked at him again, closer this time. "What happened to you?" she asked quietly.

"Nothing happened. And whatever, questions, sure," Hei slurred. Misaki tentatively walked into the house and wrinkled her nose at the foul smell. The thick odor of alcohol mixed with the reek of rotting food and a dirty home was awful in her opinion. How anyone could live in the dingy apartment was beyond her.

"Is this what you've been doing? Drinking away your sorrow? I understand that you were, uh, involved with a woman named Yin, who recently passed on, but is this all that's been happening? You've turned into the very opposite of the man you used to be?" Misaki struggled to hide her outrage at her old friend. They hadn't been very close, but his well-being still mattered to her.

"What does it matter? She's dead. There's nothing left for me to live for, okay? And nothing is going to change that, Misaki!" Hei yelled, stumbling backwards and almost falling over.

"You need to go take a bath. Now." Misaki's voice was firm, and she wasn't going to let him off the hook. Who cares if he was needed in this investigation? In this intoxicated state, it was hardly as if he would be of any help to her. She walked over to the stained, battered coffee table, and picked up the bottle of scotch. It was half empty.

"No big loss," she muttered as she carried it to the kitchen and drained the remaining alcohol out. She then swept through the entire apartment-except for Hei's bedroom-and drained all traces of beer, wine, and liquor into the sink. Just as she finished emptying the last bottle, Hei emerged from the bathroom wearing a pair of shorts. Misaki was rendered speechless for a rare moment as she took in the contours of his shirtless torso. The man had a great body, even if he neglected it so much.

"You wasted my booze," Hei said flatly.

"Only so you wouldn't waste your life," Misaki replied, her voice matching his icy tone.

"Fine. Now, ask your questions," he said, returning to the couch and kicking his legs up.

"What do you know about Yin's death?" Misaki hated getting straight to the point, but she figured bluntness was the way to go with Hei. The Li she had known was not this man. This man was different. This was a broken man with a broken mind and a broken heart.

"She was killed due to a conspiracy within the gate," Hei replied. His voice broke at the end of the sentence, and he buried his face in his hands.

"Thank you." Misaki walked over to him and patted his shoulder gently, trying to comfort him. He smacked her hand away violently and emitted a small cry of anguish before concealing his emotions once more.

"Please, Li. I know this is hard, but I still need to know. Is there anything else I should be aware of?" Misaki said.

"Yes. You have to know. I killed Yin, dammit. She's gone because of me, okay?! That's what you wanted to know, right?! That your dear old Li is a cold-blooded murderer?! Because I'm never going to forgive myself for that. My days as the Black Reaper are done!" Hei was yelling now, and tears streamed down his cheeks from the anger and sadness.

"Li? You're...BK-201?" Misaki was shocked. She wasn't even supposed to be investigating that anymore, so naturally the answer just gets thrown in her face. How had she not seen this coming?

"Yes. And my name is Hei. Just take me away now, dammit. I don't want to live anymore," Hei replied.

"I can't. Not when you're-not when you're here like this! Li-Hei-I can't take you away right now. This is too much for you. Let me help you heal from this. I won't tell anyone you're BK-201. Just let me help you." Misaki's voice dropped to a whisper. Li-Hei, whoever he was-had to be helped. This was not normal. This was not healthy.

"Fine. Make my misery even more than what it is now. Go ahead, Officer Kirihara," Hei said quietly. His formal address of her shocked her, but she realized why he'd said "Officer" quickly. She was, in fact, throwing her weight around, and that honestly wasn't fair. But this was her friend on the line, and he was throwing everything away on account of grief. And Misaki Kirihara just could not allow that.

"From now on, Hei, you will work at making this apartment spotless. I want you to clean every day for one entire week, at the end of which I will return and check on you again. You will not drink anymore, and you will eat at least 2 meals per week at the ramen house you used to like. I will check with the manager there as well to make sure you're eating. And once a week I will come over and eat dinner with you. Understood?" Misaki said firmly, clearly implying that there would be no arguing with her ultimatum.

"Yes. Now get out of my apartment," Hei replied flatly. He grabbed her arm and walked her to the door. Gently pushing her out, he shut the door behind her. Sighing heavily, he leaned against the wall. His head swam, probably from the lack of the alcohol that he had been so reliant upon.

"Pull yourself together, Hei," he muttered to himself. He walked over to a closet and opened the door, watching a plethora of cleaning supplies spill out onto the ground. Digging through the mess, Hei dredged up an old mop and bucket, and set to work at the kitchen. If he was going to be forced to cook, he may as well have a clean kitchen to work in.

With the energy and speed of the Black Reaper he'd once been, Hei had the entire apartment cleaned in just under three hours. He wiped some sweat off of the back of his shirt, and took a seat on the couch, quickly falling asleep.

**Please review! Good, bad, ugly, anything is welcome! xx**


	2. Chapter 2

Hei woke up several hours later with a pounding headache. He got up with a start after reaching for his alcohol flask and finding nothing, and jumped off the couch. "Damned cop," he muttered.

A knock at the door set him even more on edge and he threw it open, ready to take down an entire army of annoyances. "What?" he growled angrily, then saw that it was Misaki, returning after a day of letting him be.

"I hope I'm not intruding, but-" Her voice cut off suddenly as her eyes widened in surprise. The apartment was, for lack of a better word, clean. There wasn't even a speck of dust on the dresser.

"You really did it," she breathed. Blinking and coming back to her original purpose, she continued talking to Hei. "I'm here for dinner, as we arranged. Did you buy groceries, or do we need take-out for tonight? I won't take that every week, but being that it's your first day back in the realm of the living and all, I won't mind if you need to get outside food," she said, her voice once again even.

"Oh, I'm sorry." Hei's expression softened as he took in the image of the awed policewoman. Even though he might dislike her mildly, she was still helping him, and that at least deserved dinner and a polite attitude. "We're going to have to get take-out tonight because I didn't exactly have time to cook," he said, gesturing around his spotless home.

"Of course!" Misaki smiled, and she rummaged through her wallet for her favorite take-out place's phone number. Dialling, she ordered enough for fifteen people and waited as the man on the phone wrote down her choices. "Thank you," she said, and then hung up.

"They'll deliver, but it'll take some time. Is that okay?" she said. It wasn't really a question, and Hei knew it. Misaki just wanted to put on the same polite airs as him, and both of them knew it.

"Would you like to sit down?" Hei asked, gesturing to the couch, "I would offer you a glass of wine or something, but..."

"That's okay, really," Misaki replied, blushing slightly and collapsing into the seat. It was her own fault that he was out of alcohol, but she supposed that the merits of draining it all had been enough to outweigh its repercussions in this awkward moment.

"So, how have you been in the past several hours?" Hei said, trying to start a conversation. There wasn't much to talk about, anyway. They'd seen each other just that morning.

"Um, fine. My new job is less-than-entertaining, though. Not that finding and taking down contractors was the funnest of jobs, either, but at least it was interesting, yaknow? And now I feel like my life is nothing but common robberies and there's just this never-ending mountain of paperwork to go with it." She sighed, rubbing the back of her neck. "Oh, I didn't mean to dump all that on you, really! I just needed to get that off my chest, I suppose," she continued, laughing lightly.

"No, it's okay. I get it. If the Syndicate had taken me off of Reaper duty for a while, I couldn't stand it. Just sitting there doing nothing...that isn't really my idea of a great job either," Hei replied. It struck him now that he and the policewoman were really just two sides of the same coin-he was the Black Reaper, and she was the cop trying to track him down. Neither of them could stand to just stay and watch something unfold-they had to be apart of the action. What an intriguing pair of people to be eating dinner together, he supposed. The strongest contractor in the world and the best cop in Japan. The notion was almost laughable, in his opinion. In fact, it was so ridiculous an idea to him that he let out a small chuckle.

"What's so funny?" Misaki asked, confused.

"It's just, I'm the goddamned Black Reaper, and you're a cop, and we're sitting here chatting about our lives like good friends. If someone else were to be watching, what would they say?" Hei was laughing loudly now; it was probably the first time he'd smiled since...well, since Yin, really.

"I'm pretty sure they'd think we were either incredibly brave or incredibly stupid. I'd say we're a bit of both," Misaki replied, smiling. It was good to see Hei happy, she supposed.

**A/N: Hi. I totally got lazy on this story, OOPS. Well, here's chapter 2. Please review-they mean a lot! I'm working on another story right now, and that's my first priority, but I will update this one slowly but surely :)**

Don't forget to review!


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